Day 16: My Most Memorable Injuries

December 16, 2013

Holy heck, where do I start????? I was born one big giant injury!!!!! I guess I will leave out surgeries, and just start at the beginning...

Age: 3ish
Location: Our Santa Monica House
Body Part: My head 

Long story short... I did a somersault down our stairs and smashed my head on the cedar chest at the bottom. This resulted in me cracking my head open... Now since my dad travelled over half the year, my mom was really good at taking charge... She taped my head back together and took me to the hospital. Go Mom!!!!

Age: 5ish
Location: Our Santa Monica House
Body Part: My face

My very first pet was a guinea pig. His name was Squeaky and he kind of looked like a football! I loved him so much that I had to sleep with him right next to my bed. Back in the ol' days, they had wire cages... Well in the middle of the night, I rolled off the bed and caught my cheek on the corner of said cage. My parents woke up to me screaming and blood everywhere...

The hospital had to strap me down on the bed because I was a kid and they didn't want me putting my hands up to my face while they were trying to stitch me... Apparently I was pissed and kept screaming at the doctors, "I don't like that!"

I still have the scar to this day. I was very lucky to have just missed my eyeball. Lucky girl!

Age: 7ish
Location: Our Fallbrook driveway
Body Part: My chin

The neighbors and I used to ride our bikes all the time. I mean what else are you going to do in the country? So we were working on our wheelies... Wellllllll.... After my wheelie attempt, I leaned forward to much and went over the handlebars... landing on my chin. I got up, rubbed my sore chin and saw blood, and my neighbors eyes pop out of her head.

I remember my dad saying, "back to the ER". Ugggggggh. Stitches again. I guess that's what they have to do when your chin bone is sticking out of your face.

Age: 7 or 8
Location: My parent's Big Bear rental house
Body Part: My eyeballs

So my parents had to seal their driveway up at their rental house in the mountains... I guess you do that in places that snow? I don't know. Anyway, you know when you take a bag of potato chips up in a high elevation, the bag fills with air and almost explodes? Well apparently that happens with Thompson's Water Seal too.

I was standing over the can while my dad was opening it (because I'm nosey like that). As he opened the can, the liquid all shot in to my eyes... My parents rushed me inside to run my eyes under cold running water and then rushed me to the ER. The doctors ran a tube from an IV bag next to my eyeballs so that they could rinse them, then the put this weird orange stuff in my eyes, took me to a dark room, used a UV light and assessed the damage... Lucky again, no damage.

Age: 12ish?
Location: Colorado
Body Part: My shin

We went on vacation with another family who had a lakeside cabin in Colorado. One day we were all fishing and while I was baiting my hook, the little girl from the other family came running by my pole, tripping on it, ripping the hook out of my hand... the hook took a chunk out of my pinky knuckle and ended straight in my shin. Awwwweeesome! Now it didn't hurt but looked very wrong! I was okay until an old fisherman started to take out his guts covered knife and offered to cut it out of my shin.

My parents took me to the ER and luckily the doctor had lots of experience with things like this. She pulled the hook back to align the barb just right, used a credit card and flicked it right out of my shin. I never felt it go in, never felt it come out! Phewwwww!

But really.... who does this stuff happen to?

Age: 17
Location: Windy Hometown Road
Body Part: My pride, My parents trust & My freedom

I will not disclose all of the details of the accident but I was a passenger of a car that flipped and rolled down an embankment. My friend in the backseat helped drag me through the cracked back window. The ambulance came and of course... the paramedic was my BFF's dad and the other medic was a guy I had a huge crush on in high school. Best part? I puked on him! Luckily none of us were hurt but the driver was taken away in handcuffs. My parent's were out of town, so the ambulance was required to take me to the hospital where I had to wait until they were contacted and could come get me. The CHP officer happened to have been trained my dad and said, "You're BK's daughter? Oh you're in so much trouble!" Geeee thanks, cause I didn't already know that. This resulted in me being grounded for the rest of my life.

Age: 17
Location: Dark Hometown Road
Body Part: My hand

A few months after the previous injury.... I was riding with my dad's secretary to their annual business dinner. My mom had a horrible migrane so she stayed home. It was dark and we were hit head on by a guy who had "a glass of wine with dinner". If it hadn't been for our airbags, I would have gone through our winshield and his. I guess I put my hand up when we hit and smashed it with the airbag. Lucikly we were both okay. But I was afraid to get in a car for a while after that.

Age: 20ish
Location: On the way to work
Body Part: My head (again)

Driving to work, I rolled my truck almost off a cliff. Luckily I only broke the window with my head and was okay. I had to cut myself out of the seatbelt (my dad taught me to always have a knife nearby) and climb out the passenger window which was now on top.

Sitting in the ER waiting room, I met a really nice gang member who had been shot in the hand.

Age: 26
Location: My backyard
Body Part: My right calf

My ex husband was moving a dog house in the backyard while I was inside playing with Boogs who was just a baby. All of a sudden I hear him yell at me to come outside. I put Boogs in the pack and play and rush outside... Our mastiff was attacking our boxer and he couldn't get them apart. Our mastiff Bruno had Havok by his neck and I jumped in... I tried for what seemed like forever to get them apart. Havok who could barely breath by this time turned and grabbed what he could.... my calf. Once he realized what he had done, he immediately let go. I managed to separate them on each side of the dog run. By that time, the ex was surveying the damage. There was blood all over the back patio. Havok was bleeding from his neck but it was a clean wound. Where was all of this blood coming from? Then the ex said, "it's your leg". Uhhhh what? I had blood pouring out of my leg. I didn't look at it, just made sure that both dogs couldn't get to each other, calmly walked through the house grabbed a sweatshirt, tied it around my calf, grabbed the baby and got in the truck. The ex was still looking around like "WTF just happened?"

I'll spare you some of the gross details that include seeing what fat actually looks like, almost needing a blood transfusion, and things like that.

After cleaning it out, and putting 25 staples in my leg... I got an antibiotic shot in my butt that hurt like nothing else!!!! Seriously that was the only part that hurt... Thank you adrenaline!!!!!

After some training Bruno our mastiff had to be re-homed to an only dog home. I would have worked with him more but I had a baby and could NOT and would NOT risk her. My boxer Havok had to be taken to the ER, had drains put in and was stitched up.

This is where the bottom teeth went in and tore. The other side of my leg had similar injuries from the top teeth. 

Knock on wood but since the dog bite, I've been okay... and that was 8 years ago. I better not jinx myself.

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